Everything within us says that the normal Christian life is one of reaching out to others particularly the needy and those who have lost their way. It’s so hard being needy oneself and letting go the privilege of helping and engaging with others in anything like a normal way. But… it seems that for the season to come we simply batten down the hatches, protect ourselves as best as we can and walk Jane through the challenge of chemo. Suddenly the world becomes even smaller and more carefully focused. We have to try and avoid infection and carefully monitor Jane’s temperature and other symptoms to pre-empt any problem. She caught the flu last time and it became a massive problem leaving her bed-bound and very weak for weeks. She entered chemo much, much stronger then than this time. She needs to preserve what little energy she has to promote her body’s natural healing process.
Today has been difficult, trying to help Jane through the day with breathing and coughing problems rising up again. There seems to be relatively little pain though which is good as that really hospitalised her last week. She has to walk really slowly to avoid any stress or breathlessness and climbing stairs takes quite a while now to avoid a chronic bout of coughing. I’ve ordered a wheelchair via the Macmillan nurse so that should be available from Thursday to help when needing to be out, but Jane hates the idea and so do I. She is not at all disabled simply severely breathless with any exertion at all.
Again we had a special time of worship this morning and we know that God is very close to us but I have to admit that prayer is rather more challenging other than… Lord have mercy and heal Jane!
Psalm 41v2,3 ‘The Lord protects them and keeps them alive. The Lord nurses them when they are sick’ NLT)
No comments:
Post a Comment