Out With The Old

Our past can either be a stepping stone into the future or an anchor that keeps dragging us backwards. My photo today reflects my visit earlier in the year to Delamere Forest, and yeh I'm ready to return there sometime very soon. The powers that be have restored an ancient lake by felling part of the forest and changing drainage to allow flooding. Of course old tree stumps make great perches for our flying friends determined to keep their ‘feet’ dry. Not so good for nesting anymore so I guess they've moved on to new pastures for that particular activity.

I've been carefully reflecting upon my own journey through life over the past few months. And looking back I can clearly see a step change in how I'm feeling after the heavy trauma of last year. Well of course I realise that bereavement has no quick or complete fix and there are still difficult days; but nonetheless since this summer I've begun to feel like I'm in a totally different place, though it’s only because of more recent events that I've realised what has been happening. Basically as I've been reaching out to the Lord, he has changed my heart in a very special way. I enjoyed the most amazing marriage for 37 years and remained totally devoted to Jane from a couple of years before and until after she passed on. Indeed it seemed impossible for me to imagine any other way of living; yeh married life suited me totally and especially with Jane. But then God began to change me as day by day, step by step, I increasingly found complete contentment with him as my most intimate companion. A total transformation in my faith walk compared with the decades of prayer I’d enjoyed with my wife by my side. And I never imagined that the presence of God could be so real and so truly precious to a lonely ‘old’ widower like me. Although my thoughts were still trying to reconcile my potentially quite long term future with being permanently single, my heart was definitely totally at peace. I was just enjoying the Lord as I got to know him in a totally new way. I suppose you might say that I had found a place of complete acceptance in my return to being single again and was really starting to actually like the idea… until a certain rather special widow came into my life. I reckon the Lord’s timing is, as always, perfect; but somehow I can’t help but imagine him sitting on his throne in heaven with the most enormous smile on his face. What a perfect Father he is and what a great sense of humour! He truly knows what’s best for each one of us…

1 Corinthians 7:32-34 ‘I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord’s work and thinking how to please him. But a married man has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. His interests are divided. In the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be devoted to the Lord and holy in body and in spirit. But a married woman has to think about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband.’ (NLT)