I reckon I successfully followed the ‘signs’ in choosing Deal as my destination, and of course I’m back home now. In the distance you can just about see France and I wonder how long before I make that journey again? For now though I have road tax to sort out, an MOT and also child-minding duties, so no choice. And yet another good journey to be thankful for. I made 216 miles in around four hours with a couple of brief halts included and that’s quite acceptable given the size of my motorhome and the apparently permanent roadworks on the M1… 3 years to widen and maybe the same again to install traffic management is totally baffling. Why not do both at the same time, and what will they dream up next to continue travel chaos? A couple of days ago I wondered if I might end up stranded in Deal as filling stations were beginning to have long queues and I did not have enough to get back home. I ignored it for as long as I could and then found no problem apart from the profiteering on price. Anyway, this evening I feel a little tired. So, the question is ‘was the travel hassle worth it?’ and the answer of course is ‘yes!’
The unusual March weather has been fantastic and I feel so much better for spending time outdoors. Then again, I spent quality time with the Lord and for the first time began to properly recognise, experientially, that he is all I really need to live my life to the full. Of course I’ve always known that, but head knowledge is sometimes a long way from the heart. I continue to miss both Jane as a person and also marriage. It suited me and I now feel like a fish out of water, flapping around, gasping for air! But now I’m gaining confidence that God truly is my all sufficient one. That is a Christian fundamental in the face of adversity. One day the Lord may say ‘it is not good for this man to be alone’, but then again he may not. In the meantime I have to get on with living and serving others to the best of my ability.
And I mustn’t overlook my encounter with the Christian widower travelling alone in his motorhome. He had a similarly lengthy marriage to myself, though his wife died 9 years ago and he was in rather a different place from me. I’m quite sure I saw a tear in his eye at one point and he shared some quite difficult stuff about his first year of bereavement. Anyway spending such a long time with a complete stranger was a real unexpected blessing and boosted my friend-making confidence no end.
Proverbs 3:6 ‘Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.’ (NLT)
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