10th December

So this is how exciting my day has been… I’m reduced to blogging my curry recipe. Cooking for one is not easy and motivation is always the biggest hurdle. I like food though, so finding simple meals to prepare has to be the order of the day for now. I may have shared this before but this evening was typical; simply throwing a sliced leek in with my rice, then adding fried mushrooms and Quorn to half a jar of Tikka Masala and 20 minutes or so later I have a nice little meal. But what do I do with the unused half jar of curry? And why do I always make too much rice? At least everything aside from the Quorn was organic so it shouldn’t be too unhealthy.  But it sure is not much fun. For decades Jane and I would make sure we had a special evening once a week for just the two of us. Having four kids meant child minding was necessary for many years, so although we tried to organise a night out every now and again it was more often a stay at home evening. We’d ban the kids from a room and eat grown-up food (hot and spicy) whilst watching a grown-up video (maybe Shakespeare) with a couple of candles for atmosphere. I miss both Jane and the quality of life I enjoyed so very much. This morning, I realised I was talking to myself. Again! I hate being single. And I keep repeating myself. At least I have a couple of things planned for tomorrow so that should brighten things up. Today, I feel dull and rather boring.

And tonight I’m home alone as my son has found a happy escape for 24 hours or so. He’s quite a keen online gamer and for several years he’s enjoyed playing with a particular team of guys. They seem to be scattered around the country which means it’s not easy to connect, but anyway, half a dozen of them are meeting up in Bristol to enjoy a Chinese and get to know each other before doing what they always do… staying up really late to play online games. So one guy’s parents are certainly having their private space invaded this evening. And mine isn’t. Not even by one of my son’s choice of DVD’s.  

I really should get out more. I need to meet people, but I don’t know how to begin…

Genesis 2:18 ‘Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone.”’(NLT)