Tuesday, November 22, 2011

22nd November

Ever so slowly I think I’m managing to climb out of the pit of depression I’ve jumped into. So, I’m just a tiny bit brighter today. Visiting my daughter in Loughborough always makes me feel good though she had me crying for the first time in a couple of days as we talked about her mum. She’s been thinking the same thoughts as me, about how unreal the permanence of Jane’s passing seems. It’s impossible to get to grips with the fact that she won’t just walk back into our lives at any moment; she was in many ways much larger than life and made both our lives so much richer. And my daughter needs the kind of support that a mum could best bring right now. Her husband has been told he needs treatment for a small hole in the heart that he was probably born with. He’s a rugby playing giant of a man, very strong and very fit and it’s hard to imagine he has a serious problem, but that doesn’t sound like a minor condition that could be ignored to me. Jane was the prayer warrior when it came to our kids… I trust she still is!

O Lord have mercy upon my life and my family. Forgive me for allowing darkness to invade my thoughts when I should be living in the light of your wonderful love. You are truly all I need to live a full life, so all of my hope, all of my trust is in you and you alone. Serving and honouring you is my heart’s desire so help me to please you my God. Watch over my life and my children and grandchildren, Lord keep us for yourself and Godly purpose; restore my health, heal my son-in-law, bless my kids in their places of work and my grandkids at school and playgroup. Jesus may you be lifted up in our lives, let your kingdom come and your will be done, here in this place on earth as it is in heaven… Amen.

I’m off out now to my church house group. I’ve been asked to play a couple of worship songs so that’ll keep me out of mischief… maybe!

Romans 8:34 ‘Christ Jesus is at the right hand of God and is also praying for us.’ (NIRV)

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