Monday, February 14, 2011

14th Feb 10.30pm

One of the most special times of my life was when we had all four of our children at home, two were still pre-school. Most of the burden of raising them fell on Jane due to my working hours and I used to love coming home, especially Friday nights when they stayed up late finding everything calm and peaceful, neat and tidy and always welcoming. Children need a fixed and strong routine and Jane is a genius at putting this in place for them… I still find looking after young children rather a mystery with completely haphazard results! Anyway my point is that living with some sort of regular routine helps us to feel secure. This last 72 hours has been completely lacking in this for us and I feel just a little wobbly.

I’ve only had maybe 6 hours sleep in 3 days, Jane rather less, and yet my mind is in overdrive striving to work things out. This blog is so helpful in putting thoughts together that it’s almost irrelevant if anyone but me ever reads it! It feels a little clichéd to say but nonetheless this is a perfect time for us to let go and to let God work things out for us. We gave our lives to Christ many years ago and we have no right to take them back. At the end of the day whatever plans we make he directs our paths anyway… and always works for good.

Jane was discharged from hospital this morning feeling a lot better than Friday. Complete rest in a warm room probably helped as much as several medical treatments so I need to restrain her natural enthusiasm for work to make sure she continues to recover. There’s no way she could make the appointment tomorrow for chemotherapy preparation so we’ll speak to her consultant in his oncology clinic next Monday and work out the best way forward then.

I’m reminded of a really old chorus we sang in the 80’s… ‘My life is in you Lord, my strength is in you Lord, my hope is in you Lord, in you it’s in you it’s in you!’

Psalm 91v1 ‘Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty’ (NLT)

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