Monday, March 14, 2011

14th March Chemo Day 21

An exhausting, highly stressful day. But a day of some good news… sort of. It feels a bit like taking the first step on a journey to climb Mount Everest, a few inches seems little progress on a 29,000 foot climb. But it is progress. Jane had an x-ray today which unfortunately was mostly unclear because she was unable to take a deep enough breath to provide a comparison with previous x-rays. However there was one particular lesion which could be compared and which her consultant was absolutely sure had shrunk. He qualified this by saying that this did not automatically translate to shrinkage in the other growths but nonetheless this is good news and after careful assessment of Jane’s condition he recommended that the next cycle of chemotherapy should continue tomorrow, Tuesday afternoon.

Our wonderful eldest daughter persuaded her kind boss to let her have half a day off work to come with us to Nottingham. How thoughtful and a marvellous distraction wandering around different departments for three hours or so. Tonight the ‘oxygen’ man delivered machines and gas bottles to provide Jane with as much oxygen as she needs and hopefully using that and medication in a more informed way will improve Jane’s symptoms.

Sometimes it seems that whilst our faith in God and his goodness is totally secure our hope for Jane’s healing in this lifetime is rather more wobbly. It remains very difficult to step away from the very loud voice of our circumstances and listen to the still small voice of God. Faith is a gift from God but we very much have a choice in how we exercise it. Nothing is impossible for God… he delights to bless his children; he delights to heal and restore.

Matthew 17v20 ‘Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.’ (NIV)

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