22nd July

I need to meet with God. Sometimes life feels like hard work with little to see for all the effort. And yet I know that my God can lift me out of this slog in an instant, I’ve known what it’s like to hear his voice and then walk down the pathway he directs, enjoying his presence, receiving his favour. So although I do not deserve it, somehow I’m hoping for a fresh God encounter; more than that I suppose I’m expecting it… a life changing meeting, a new call upon my life bringing a revival of purpose. I’m impatient I know but that’s what I need for sure.

I went on a longer walk today and I’m not used to it so everything aches a little. I was tired before I set out but it seems a good idea to push myself and see if I can recover some strength and fitness. I spent the first 5 months of this year in an almost completely sedentary lifestyle as I cared for Jane and so physically that’s had an effect on my strength and stamina. My son is becoming increasingly helpful around the home as he now tackles the more physical jobs I used to manage, but it would be much better if he could get full time work. He has good qualifications but no experience in his chosen field and it seems a whole generation of young people are in danger of being stranded in low-skill part-time employment which is all that’s available at the moment. At least he works at home as right now even say pushing my petrol mower around my smallest lawn leaves me feeling a little dizzy and rather weak. And that’s no good… I have to regain my natural strength. I’m sure stress has something to do with it but hopefully I’ll be able to move into an easier season of life next. I need refreshing, time out from the battle to simply survive and some nice things to do and enjoy without pressure. My youngest daughter’s making progress with her wedding plans so that’s one thing to look forward to in the near future. And my son has just told me about another job he can apply for tomorrow so who knows… maybe I’ll start getting some board money from him and then I can go camping a bit more often. That always clears my head!

Genesis 3:8 ‘Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day’ (NIV)