Saturday, May 26, 2012

26th May 2012

In God’s strength we can overcome every obstacle. Yes, this morning my pathway was somewhat obstructed after a cliff fall. But there were warning signs everywhere advising caution because of the danger of falling rocks. And I’ve had another fantastic day, with perfect weather and a great walk, though my initial route took me along the cliff top so when the footpath seemed just a little too close to the edge I turned back. I suffer very slightly from vertigo and decided I might as well walk where I felt more comfortable. Apart from the rather messy chalk, a simple scramble over the rocks enabled me to resume today’s ramble, though this section of my walk is not that exciting. It’s owned by the M.O.D. and is a rather derelict Royal Marines firing range with lots of collapsing concrete everywhere.

The Lord is being really good to me as I spend these few days on my own, I feel totally at peace and I’m actually enjoying myself. I just love being outdoors in sunny weather and am quite convinced it’s beneficial in recovery from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. And I’m even getting used to pretty much being on my own which is surprising, as the only people I’ve talked to all week are my immediate neighbours on the campsite. This afternoon had some potential for embarrassment though, as after parking up on my pitch I wandered across the back of theirs to plug my electricity cable in… let’s just say I caught a not quite so young lady sunbathing continental style! She didn’t bat an eyelid, so neither did I and as us Brit’s do, I simply made brief remark of the wonderful weather. Ah well these things happen, but I think I’m old fashioned or something. Maybe Godly, but it’s certainly not for me to judge.

As I spend this time walking with the Lord I can begin to feel the pain of bereavement easing. Now and again I think of Jane and instinctively run through her experience during the final few days of life, wondering what she was thinking and feeling behind the confusion of morphine sedation. But unlike in even the very recent past, my thoughts simply do not progress beyond a couple of minutes. If that. It’s as though the Lord is saying enough is enough, I don’t need to torture myself with these memories any longer. He’s preparing me to move on with the rest of my life.

Psalm 147:3 ‘He heals the brokenhearted’

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